Demons
by kiwi333
Summary: Jules must fce her past demons after a hard case.


**Demons**

**A dark past**

Sometimes this job sucked for the members of the SRU's team one. Today was shard, especially for Jules. This girl held a man at gun point who killed her mother but the team was the one that had to end her life. Cases like these brought up Jules's past which she rarely talked about. Just like the subject Jules lost her mom too. Of course she wasn't killed by a man or woman but cancer. She watched he mother die right before her eyes, when she did pass the woman Jules' called her mother wasn't the mom that she knew but a pale sick stranger. Whenever these memories were brought back up Jules took out the one photo album she had from her father. Every single picture in there was of Jules and her mom. She would sit with it in her lap and stare at each picture till her vision blurred. On the really bad days Jules would find herself trying so hard to remember when, where and who took the picture Sam never knew she did this, Jules sonly did it when he was out and was done before he came back and there was no trace of her tears left. The tissues in the trash and the album back in its spot. This time she didn't wait for him to leave. As soon as they got home Jules ran to their bedroom and pulled it out. Tears filled her eyes as she looked at a picture of her mom before she got sick.

"Jules sweetheart, are you okay? You seemed upset on the drive home." Sam asked her following Jules into the bedroom, when he did enter he found Jules crying i=on the bed looking at something.

"I miss her so much sometimes, it's the littlest things that remind me of her. Like rivers, God she loved rivers. Now all I have left is this book full of pictures." Jules sobbed. Sam just walked over to her, climbed onto the bed and pulled her into a hug trying to console her.

"This is about your mom right? The call brought it up, I could tell by your facial expressions during the Scorpio call Sarge made." Sam had never seen Jules cry this much before, she made gut wrenching sounds as she sobbed into his chest.

"It's not fair, it's just not fair that the killer got to live but the girl didn't." Jules continued to cry but this time Sam pulled away from her.

"Jules stop, it's going to be okay. You can get through this because yes life isn't fair but we learn to deal with it." Sam said kissing away the tears on her cheek.

'I just wish she was here sometimes. I wish she could meet you, I know she would have loved you." Jules said with a sniffle.

'Jules have I ever told you about my sister?" Sam asked, he never really liked talking about this but he knew it would help Jules.

**Remember When**

"After she died my parents never took anything down, every day I would see her face everywhere in the house. My dad never really said anything to me but I could tell he thought it was my fault. If I had pushed her out of the way she would still be here. I'm not saying that missing someone id bas but they let it rule their lives. My dad and my mom through themselves into their work. The general took on more and more tours while my mom volunteered on the PTA, every field trip or fundraiser. Anything to keep her mind off what happened. I don't want you to be like them, you have to know that you couldn't save your mom Jules, no one could. And may suck but it happened so we have to deal with it, just remember the good times." Sam said into Jules ear, she was the only person he ever told that to. With her he felt he could be his true self.

"My mom and I used to go to rivers, we'd even take trips just to see one. She loved rivers and now whenever I see a river I think of her." Jules confessed to him.

"See those are the types of memories that you need o remember okay?" Sam told her still holding her even though she has calmed own a long time ago. It was like he couldn't let her go, in his arms Sam knew Jules was safe and sound.

"Thank you Sam, for everything." Jules said kissing his cheek as a small token of the love she had for hm.

"Come on let's go for a drive." Sam said pulling her towards the car, he has an idea that he knew would make Jules smile.

"Sam where are we going? I've been up all night! This is out only day off for another two weeks!" Jules complained but she still got in the car. She wanted to know why Sam was in such a hurry.

"Just trust me, I knew you are going to like where we're going I promise." Sam said taking his hand off the steering wheel and gave her hand a reassuring squeeze.

"Fine but you owe me nig time for this." Jules dais crossing her arms over her chest trying o pout but couldn't help as a smile appeared onto her face.

'We'll see, when this is over you might owe me. I wouldn't get too sure of myself if I were you." Sam said grinning to himself, in his mind he should get a coffee mug saying 'World's greatest boyfriend' when all this was over. Really he just wanted to see Jules smile.

**Herself**

"Okay we're here. You go outside and I'll stay in the car." Sam said reaching over Jules and opened her car door.

'Sam what are you doing? And where are we?" Jules said not getting out of the car that was parked in the middle of nowhere.

'Just trust me and go outside. I promise I won't leave you here." Sam said, once Jules finally left the car he closed the door and watched her from the window.

Jules walked for a bit before she came to a river that took her breath away. Instantly Jules knew what Sam was doing. Sometime she wondered what she did to get a guy as great as Sam. Opening up about his sister was a huge step in their relationship. Sam felt like he trusted Jules enough to tell her about a really painful part of his past. She was really touched, the least she could do was try and support what he wanted for her. Sam was special to Jules, sure there had been some others guys but none of them were like Sam. With him Jules could finally be her, not the female officer at the SRU, or just some girl but her. And for that she would be forever in love with him, but now it was time to get dew to business.

Hi Mom

Jules took a deep breath closing her eyes trying to "See" her mom again. She used to do it all the time when her mom first died but she hadn't done it in years. Jules didn't know where to start.

'Hi mom...I'm not really sure what I'm doing so just bear with me. I hope you've been keep tabs on me. I really miss you..." Jules said letting a few tears spill out of her eyes. "I'm sure you know about Sam too, don't worry though he's good to me mom. I think you would approve. Dad and everyone else still miss you, I still miss you. I still find myself thinking that you'll just walk around the corner and I'll get to hug you one last time. I hope you're happy for me but you have no clue how hard it was for me to grow up without a mom! I needed you and you weren't there, you'll never get to hold my kids or be at my wedding. It's not fair! Mom I miss you and I know you'll always be with me. I love you" After that Jules just sat there thinking about her mom and all the great memories she had of when her mom wasn't sick. Once the tears came they couldn't stop. As hard as Jules tried she couldn't compose herself.

**Take Me Home**

Jules heard footsteps coming up behind her. She could feel her heart rate increase as Jules tried to figure out who it was. Sam's familiar hand was on her shoulder, slowly he sunk down to her level. Jules immediately fell on his chest sobbing once again, it was all too much.

'It hurts, God it hurts so much Sam." Jules cried out, it was like she was grieving all over again.

"I know, you're going to be okay. It won't hurt forever." Sam said trying to soothe her but nothing seemed to work. Jules just cried more and more.

"Sam don't leave okay?" Jules said after she had cried herself out.

"Okay Jules I promise I won't ever leave, I promise." Sam said kissing her head.

"Take me, I've said goodbye, I just want to go home." Jules said as Sam took her hand leading her to the car. Jules looked back one last time finally she could let go.

"Goodbye mom." Jules spoke quietly, she got in the car. The silence filled the car the whole way home. Jules was looking out the window and Sam focussed on the road.

**Just Like You**

Sam and Jules both decided that after the day they both ha it was time to relax in bed.

"You would be a great mom you know?" Sam said to Jules who was lying with her head on his chest.

"Are you crazy? I could never be a mom and a cop!" Jules said harshly, sure she had thought about having kids but working t the SRU it would be impossible. With the long hours and the never ending calls.

"Oh I'm totally serious, Jules you're great with Izzy. Just think if you had one of our own. She'd be a little you!" Sam said starting to get excited at the thought of it all.

"Why would out daughter or son have to look like me? I think they'd have my hair, your eyes and act like both of us." Jules said smiling at him.

"And how many of these babies would you like Miss. Callaghan?" Sam said kissing his way down Jules' neck.

"I don't know but we can always practice." Jules said suggestively.

"I like the way you think." Sam told her giving her a passionate kiss.


End file.
